Monday, December 11, 2006

Dolphins 21-Patriots 0

Call this one "The Curious Incident of the Coach Who Didn't Bark in the Post-Game Press Conference".

Bill Belichick is not a contrarian. In the immediate aftermath of a game, the Pats coach is too drained for head games. He almost never finds fault with victories or consolation prizes in defeats (by Monday, that can change).

So the most noteworthy fact about Miami's shutout whuppin' of New England was Belichick's relative equanimity following perhaps the most feeble offensive performance of the Tom Brady era. Things are tough all over when the indispensable quarterback gets lifted from the game for his physical and mental health. Yet Belichick didn't give his tean the savage critique it richly deserved.

"We're 9-4," Belichick said. "There are a lot of teams that'd like to have that record. We'll be judged on the body of work."

After a third straight shoddy game (11 turnovers) and failing to cross the Dolphin 33, Belichick's reaction startled this outside observer. It's not the coach I used to cover. After some time scrutinizing the replay, two explanations for Belichick's reaction come to mind.

Belichick agrees with the Gee Theory of the Annual Stinkbomb outlined here after the Lions game last week. The Dolphins came out flying, the Pats' biorhythms were out of synch, and the result had to be accepted as a distasteful but inevitable part of the season, like two-a-days or talking to reporters.

The only problem with this explanation is it depends on Belichick agreeing with me, a remote and frankly terrifying possibility. The more likely possibility, however, should terrify Pats fans even more.

Perhaps Belichick WAS playing head games with his team. He'd scolded them all week for their effort against the Lions, and the result was an even worse effort against Miami. Time for Plan B. Spend whatever part of the next week is devoted to motivation reminding his players they are, in the final analysis, a talented bunch who ought to be able to improve as a matter of course. Let serenity flow through the organization from the top down.

Throwing an emotional change-up is Coaching 101. Walter Camp probably did it at Yale before the 1895 Harvard game. For Belichick to do so less than 30 minutes after such a lousy game, however, is wildly out of character, and must've taken a considerable amount of self-control. So much self-control, in fact, I suspect the coach began preparing his remarks well before yesterday's game ended, and possibly before it began.

In short, Belichick's post-game demeanor suggests he saw this turkey coming a long way off. That's an ominous thought for a team headed for the playoffs. Time for Plan B indeed.

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