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So Much for the Marketing Executive of the Year Award

Last night, watching a TV show almost no one did, and lucky them, I got a much better idea of why LeBron James made himself the star of the most unfortunate reality television program ever broadcast.

I didn't see "The Decision" but since I was still alive yesterday, I was exposed to many, many clips from the greatest moment in Greenwich, Connecticut sports history, and James had the demeanor of a man (and we've all been there) aware that what had seemed like a good idea in planning was in the event revealing itself to be a horrible, horrible idea.

Which it was. James took a straightforward business decision to change his place of employment and turned it into an occasion which made him a villain to millions (bad) and a laughingstock to millions more (worse). The last guy who managed that daily double was Jay Leno.

But aside from silly vainglory, what did James do to hurt anybody? He was going to make fans of the teams he didn't join unhappy no matter what. As a matter of professional etiquette and common decent courtesy, James should have informed the Cavaliers he was leaving them at the altar before making the move public.

Had the Cavs reacted with hurt dignity to James' snub, I'd feel sorrier for the franchise. Owner Dan Gilbert's full-bore snit of a response, composed of equal parts methamphetamine, tequila, and Glenn Close in "Naked Attraction," makes leaving the Cavaliers seems like a sound decision for any player. I sure wouldn't want to work for a loony like that unless I had to.

It is also amusing to see that James has been criticized for leaving the Cavs in pursuit of a title by those noted team-first former players Charles Barkley, Reggie Miller and Chris Webber. Were I James, their harsh words would indicate that my choice of the Heart was a sound one.

For the record, I am unsure if the three amigos of the Miami Heat will live happily ever after next season. A team with James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh can't possibly fail to win 50 games even if's completely dysfunctional, but the Celtics and Magic need not lose sleep to fear. There is a reason the U.S. Olympic team or NBA All-Star teams look disjointed on the court even as they are winning. Melding superstars is a delicate task which requires considerable on-court maturity from said superstars. James' maturity is in serious doubt right now.

My son Josh said last night that James' spectacle put a new light on Josh's longtime thought that James and he were the same age. Josh was seeing that in real terms, James' pampered NBA existence means that the average 25-year old such as himself is in reality way more of a grown-up than a national sports idol who just happened to be born in the same year.

Did James act like a spoiled kid for the last week? Sure. How else can he be expected to act? What else has he ever been? What else was the entire pursuit of King James by a half-dozen NBA franchises than further spoiling by a group of willful, egocentric rich guys who much less excuse for their behavior than James.

Which brings me back to last night's show. It was put on by the Heat as the introduction to a press conference in which James, Wade and Bosh would discuss their future magnificence. I assume the audience were Heat season ticket holders, if there is such a thing, because as a rule, sports franchises do not put on music video spectaculars to entertain sportswriters.

There were billowing clouds of colored smoke and flashing lights. There was music, "How Do You Like Me Now," to be precise (way to show some originality, Heat PR department). James, Bosh and Wade took the stage in that order, in their uniforms, and hopped around to music not quite current enough not to be foolish.

It was, in short, the same claptrap that is staged before the start of every NBA game in every arena in the league. It is all LeBron James knows about staging and promotion, as routine a part of his working life as morning traffic is for most of the rest of us. The league has made hype and fraudulent spectacle as much a part of its business as its actual sport for decades now (So has James' partner in broadcasting crime, ESPN). Why should anyone in basketball, or any basketball fan, be surprised if a player literally brought up on hype tries to generate some of his own?

posted by Michael Gee @ 7:30 AM